Monday, 31 May 2010

Happy Camper

We are off on a camping trip to Shrewsbury tomorrow, so I've had to weigh in today instead of Thursday, so only 4 days since my last weigh in. Truth be told I was a touch apprehensive, worried that 4 days might not be enough to see a difference, or that last week's mega loss might turn out to be an anomaly. I was psyching myself up to have a brave face if I'm honest. So I'm delighted to be able to report a nice steady 2 lbs loss tonight. Phew!

Now obviously the important thing is not to lose my grip over the next few days while we are away. So I have meal planned, snack planned, emergency planned - there should be no meal situation I am unable to deal with! I have already cooked our meal for tomorrow night - a nice Food Optimised spaghetti bolognaise, so very easy to heat on a camping stove once the tent's up! There will be barbecue one night, chicken salad another, and I've even built in a takeaway plan - I will have fish with the batter removed and half a portion of chips. My breakfast porridge is packed, and fresh fruit and salads will be bought on a day by day basis. Nothing will go wrong.

See you on the other side!

Thursday, 27 May 2010


I had forgotten so much!

I had forgotten what to eat, how to eat, what I ate when, and how I made it. This week has been a journey of rediscovery as I dug out old favourite recipes and remembered just how much I enjoyed making them. I have eaten so many delicious meals that have left me wondering what on earth made me go back to beige food 5 months ago. It's been such fun furtling among my jars of herbs and spices, choosing which to add to that chilli or this pasta sauce. I make awesome pasta sauce! And fruit! Sweet, sweet fruit. The simple delight of a peach, the satisfaction of a banana eaten to stave of an early morning blood sugar drop when I'm working a night shift, the complexity of the wonderful pineapple - worth the effort every time!

I had forgotten what it was like not to suffer with heartburn all the time. I have a very large bottle of Gaviscon on my bedside table, and I had needed to take it every day, sometimes several times a day. But for the last 7 days I have not needed a single drop. My stomach is calm and settled.

I had forgotten what it was like not to be slightly worried every time I got dressed that this time something would be too tight to wear, this time my bra might not fasten, this time I wouldn't be able to breathe in my jeans, this time my one last fitting uniform wouldn't pull on over my arms. That slight nagging fear has grown over the last several months, even coming true in a couple of cases. This week the fear is gone. I have been able to dress myself in a relaxed manner, and in fact even had to add a belt to my jeans today, so much looser than only a week ago!

I had forgotten the feeling of elation caused by standing on the scales at weigh in and seeing those numbers drop. But I remember now, because when I stood on the scales tonight, I was 9.5lbs lighter than one week ago. Can you see my grin from there?

Friday, 21 May 2010

Once Upon A Time....there was a woman who seemed at first so very successful at following her healthy eating plan, and lost lots and lots of weight. And then she began to struggle, and bit by bit her victories began to slip away. Pound by pound, inch by inch the fat returned. For a long time this woman battled to regain control, and sometimes it seemed as though she might win! But then in the depths of a freezing winter the war was lost. She stopped turning up to her Slimming World class, stopped taking the Orlistat her GP had prescribed, stopped cooking delicious healthy meals from scratch, turning instead to convenience food, instant comfort. And the longer she allowed this to go on, the harder it became to return. At first she felt horribly guilty each Monday evening, knowing that she should have been at her class, being weighed, being inspired, offering and receiving support from other people in the same boat. But eventually the guilt began to fade, leaving nothing more than a slight sense of failure...

If you have come to read about gloriously successful weight loss, you may have landed in the wrong place. But if you are happy to read about someone who is prepared to get up, dust herself down and start all over again, I'm your woman!

Last night I took a deep breath and walked back into Slimming World. Stepping back on the scales was terrifying, but also somehow a relief. It was as bad as I expected, but no worse. I weighed in at 20st 2.5lbs. A weight I never wanted to see again. But the only way to stop myself going all the way back to my highest weight is to stop it now, and that is what I am doing. I haven't got any other goal in mind than "getting back in control". Once I feel as though I am in control I will consider goals.

So my target for this week is to lose anything at all that I can, and I will do this by following the Plan 100%. No pills, no gimmicks, no shortcuts. It's all about the food.

Wish me luck!